SkillHer Meets March; Discussion Connect Session Recap

The online SkillHer Discussion Connect session held on March 29th, 2025 at 4 PM focused on: Finding Your Balance: Career Growth, Relationships & Long Term Friendships.

Monilola; a current Project Management Trainee introduced the Skillher community to everyone on the meeting, alongside a bit of introduction of the facilitators and the theme of the day.

The discussion connect was moderated by SkillHer’s programs manager, Kofoworola Akinsola- an Epidemiologist and Public Health Researcher via Google meets. Four members of the SkillHer community served as Panelists for the session with other community members joining in via Google meets.

Each of them introduced themselves.

The first speaker Eunice Olaleye, is a Content creator & Podcaster

The second speaker, Goodness Iruoma, is an Entrepreneur with a bookstore located in Ibadan and Lagos

The third speaker Dr. Maryam Zakariaya, is a Veterinarian, Public Health advocate & school administrator

The fourth speaker Obapelumi Mercy Obafumisho, is a graduate of the University of Ibadan, an administrative personnel & personal development entrepreneur.

The first round of discussion was on: Defining Balance: A Personal Perspective

For Dr. Maryam, Structure and Consistency is key stating balance is about accomplishing what needs to be done at the appropriate time. She believes it is feasible when approached with structure and discipline.

Eunice sees balance as giving a reasonable quota of effort to different aspects of life. Rather than striving for a perfect 50/50 split, she believes in distributing efforts based on priorities. It has to be effort and Prioritization

Goodness views balance as understanding what season of life you are in and recognizing what is necessary at that moment. She emphasizes self-awareness as the key to knowing where to direct your energy.

For Obapelumi, balance means harmonizing different aspects of life rather than compartmentalizing them. Pursuing personal growth should feel natural, not overwhelming.

Setting Boundaries Between Work and Personal Life was the focus of the second round of discussion.

Facilitators mentioned that maintaining a balance between professional and personal life is a challenge, but setting boundaries can help:

Dr. Maryam establishes rules and communicates them to those around her, ensuring clear separation between work and personal time.

Kofo notes that boundaries are necessary and requires continuous communication efforts and adaptability.

Obapelumi highlights the importance of taking breaks, shutting down distractions, and focusing on self-care.

Thirdly, Sustaining Friendships in a Busy World/Making and Keeping Strong Friendships

Eunice advises being gracious to yourself and others, continuously evolving, learning, and prioritizing meaningful relationships.

Goodness keeps a small, close-knit circle of friends, ensuring quality over quantity.

Obapelumi stresses discernment, recognizing that some friendships may not fit into new seasons of life.

Green Flags in Long-Term Friendships-forth discussion in which each facilitator shared key qualities they look for in friendships.

Dr. Maryam: Understanding and relatability.

Eunice: Teachability and mutual respect.

Goodness: Loyalty and shared value systems.

Obapelumi: Integrity, alignment with purpose, and thoughtfulness.

We also talked about Handling Conflicts Between Career and Friendships

While conflicts are inevitable, handling them with grace is crucial. Eunice suggests prioritization and self-awareness, ensuring that both career and friendships receive the attention they deserve without unnecessary guilt.

Kofo emphasized prioritizing relationships that enhance your growth and not feeling guilty for making such choices. Furthermore, she emphasized the importance of discretion regarding past friendships or while there’s a conflicts, condemning the act of sharing private information about them and advising against such behavior.

Last but not the least, we discussed some Personal Rituals to Stay Grounded. Afterall, successful individuals often rely on personal habits to maintain balance:

Dr. Maryam listens to motivational podcasts, journals positive affirmations, and places them on her door as reminders.

Obapelumi takes intentional breaks, prays, and writes to herself.

Goodness invests in self-growth, ensuring she remains aligned with her values.

Final Advice for Women Struggling to Find Balance

Each facilitator left powerful advice for women seeking balance:

Dr. Maryam: "Be consistent. Sometimes it gets hard, but don’t give up. Keep putting one foot in front of the other."

Eunice: "Identify what’s important. Don’t settle for less, keep investing in yourself, and never stop learning."

Goodness: "Be self-aware. Understand yourself, invest in growth, and strive to become a better person."

Obapelumi: "Maintain integrity, align actions with purpose, and practice thoughtfulness. Balance is about harmonizing all aspects of your life."

Final Thoughts from Skillher 

Balance is not about perfection but about making intentional choices that align with personal goals and values. By setting boundaries, nurturing meaningful relationships, and staying true to oneself, anyone can create a fulfilling and harmonious life.